Begin it now!

It's been a while!!!! I've missed you blog :)

When you sit and day dream and imagine what your perfect life would be do you attach timelines? Married by this age, have a home by this time, start a family at this point, perfect career when.... I have to admit, I'm guilty! 
When we attach these timelines are we sabotaging the dream? If we achieve them later are they any less rewarding or is the timeframe part of the dream? If we knew when everything was going to happen what kind of life would it be? So many questions. 
Nick and I are moving to Champaign in July and I have been exploring my options. I was presented with the opportunity to start a PhD in Kinesiology at the University of Illinois. This is something that I have thought about before and in fact I went so far as to interview for a position in 2007. At that point life happened and I was pulled in other directions. I wasn't sure if it was something I really wanted. I met my husband and I had a job I loved. It just wasn't the right time. 
When presented with the opportunity again, I got butterflies, I was excited but then doubt crept in. I thought to myself I am 31 years old; what about children, career, finances. I decided to consider other avenues. The meetings I had were positive but the idea of the PhD just kept resurfacing. After much consideration I've decided to go for it. I'm going to jump with both feet and see what happens. It's never too late, I'm not too old and who gives a crap about what anyone else thinks!!!!! PS my family approves :)    

I leave you with a bit of inspiration. I couldn't have said it better myself.

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back– Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth that ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.”

—Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Commit.  Begin.  Believe in it with everything in you.  And then just trust.

I’ll see it when I believe it. GOOOOO Me!!!!

Alana :)

Emotion Sandwich: Excited, Nervous, Anxious with a side of Humbled

Cheers to Champaign! 

Now that sounds like a celebration :)

Excited. I am very excited to say that my husband, Nick, was offered an Assistant Professors position at the University of Illinois. I am very excited to see all of Nick's hard work, passion and dedication pay off. He knows what he wants and he really has sacrificed to get it. I admire that more then I can express. Such a proud wife-ie!
Being the strong and independent women that I am I have found myself a little lost in this great news. I am excited for new opportunities and to put down some roots in a more permanent place. I am thrilled about the potential of growing our little family and having a home. I am excited to develop my business, empower.ed bodhi - manual therapy, therapeutic exercise &  fitness.  I am so excited for him and us, because we are a team, but this is a new frontier for this Canadian Girl. I will be moving to the United States (always a Canadian Girl) and starting another chapter in my own life story.
Nervous. At the same time, I am nervous. Moving across the world, again. What will people be like? Will I fit in? Will I find my own success? What about my Canadian friends and family? I miss them soooo much! I have never been to Champaign but Nick tells me it is a great place. We are flying over to buy a home in April, so exciting!!! I am really hoping this helps to relieve some of the nervousness. I'm looking forward to exploring the different neighborhoods, finding the whole foods grocery stores, figuring out the best places to run and do yoga and getting a sense of the community.
Anxious. We move July 22nd and some days it can't come fast enough and others I feel like I need more time to organize and figure it all out. 

Can you ever figure it all out?!?!?! 

Humbled by the lesson. I think the important thing when experiencing nervousness and anxiety is not to ignore them or take the approach of being tough. Recognize that nervousness and anxiety are a message. Spending time with with these feelings will lead you to discover the source of the message and what you have to heal can be achieved in many ways. You have to find what works best for you, but here are some approaches that have helped me.

1. Welcome it. Make peace with anxiety. Reassure yourself that it is ok and normal to experience these feelings when something is bothering you. Fighting with anxiety or resisting it will cause it to intensify and persist.

2. Write about it. The slower pace of writing and full engagement of your senses helps you travel down the path of the message to its source. Hence my blog. We don’t always know where our anxiety is coming from, so we have to take the time to dig and poke. Plus, we’re literal people. Our thoughts are literal. By using a linguistic mechanism the analogy of anxiety message becomes more clear and easier to work with.

3. Laugh. Bring more laughter in to your life. 

4. Love. Express love for people, places, and things that you cherish. Embrace the moment.

5. Help others. The more people you help, the greater a vocabulary you’ll develop, and this will help empower your inner dialog for when you’re sitting with anxiety.

6. Meditate/ practice relaxation techniques. Anxiety races thoughts and can be very distracting. With a rushing mind, it’s hard to hear the anxiety message and follow it back to its source. If you can learn to notice your thoughts without attaching to them—seeing them as cars passing by as you stand on the edge of a busy highway—you’ll become better at picking out what really matters in this moment.

7. Realize that You Are Enough in this Moment. Realize that you are your own solution. You have what you need to look clearly; to hear and to heal. Anxiety is a message born within you, speaking to you through you, and therefore it’s within you to heal. Be accountable, no matter how much “such and such/so and so did” to you. It doesn’t matter. Now is what we have to work with. Tomorrow is what we have to create.

By acknowledging and learning about your feelings, spending time with it and finally holding in your hand, you can enjoy the next step: You can relax your grip, and let it fall away. It will have served its purpose. You will have loved that part of yourself and it won’t need to get your attention with such a difficult message again. These emotions are a gift the same as excitement; you will feel connected, you will feel an inner fullness, you will recognize your own strength and power over your own life.

All we have to do is listen…